Elvis Mitchell reviews Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights. "It's one of the rare films for which a blooper reel would be redundant." [NYTimes]

Estelle Stewart Axton, 85, a Founder of Stax Records, Dies. [NYTimes]

Prince Partying Like It's 2004. "[Prince] has announced he will hit the road with the New Power Generation for his first major arena tour in six years in support of his new CD, Musicology."

Death Threats Made To Darkness Singer.

Is this propaganda? Oral Sex Shown to Be Linked to Mouth Cancer.

Sex in the First Person by Chelsea Peretti "Crush." [via Elizabeth]

Stereogum says "Pandas Are The New Trucker Hat". In related news, (file this under "Bizarre" and "Wish I Were There"): Pandas in Times Square. According to Gothamist, the Pandas were present for a NY State Lottery commercial shoot.

This is so great: Log Cabin Republicans Criticize President Bush’s Support for Anti-Family Constitutional Amendment.

"Log Cabin Republicans are more determined than ever to fight the anti-family Constitutional amendment with all our resources," said Log Cabin Executive Director Patrick Guerriero, in response to the President’s announcement that he will push for the anti-family amendment. "Writing discrimination into our Constitution violates conservative and Republican principles. This amendment would not strengthen marriage—it would weaken our nation."...

"Today the President has embraced an amendment that is the product of the radical right. They have mastered the art of gay-bashing after decades of practice. Log Cabin bases our opposition to this anti-family amendment on the principles of American freedom outlined in our Constitution. History will not look back kindly on this assault of our Constitution," continued Guerriero.

Let me just say right up front that I have never seen the point to writing "FanFiction." That said, I must show you this: "Two Wrongs May Be Right." The West Wing meets The A-Team. The President's daughter is kidnapped and CJ thinks the A-Team can help. [Thanks Charles.]

Charles also brought this to my attention: Giant Shrimp in the Laundry Room. A transcript of a woman stating how she saw a living 5 ft. shrimp in her basement laundry room in 1948.

Defiant Downloads Rise From Underground. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

A Report on Childhood Obesity. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Ew! Never Eat Lunch at Your Desk. [via Stereogum]

The worst places for bacteria in the office are (in order and on average):

* Telephone: 25,127 germs per square inch
* Desktop: 20,961 germs per square inch
* Keyboard: 3,295 germs per square inch
* Computer mouse: 1,676 germs per square inch
* Toilet seat: 49 germs per square inch

And you might want to wash your hands after you send a fax. Bacteria levels on the typical office fax machine are three times higher than on the bathroom door.

How can this possibly be for real?? Paltrow To Rap? [via Best Week Ever]

February 23, 2004

Hollywood actress Gwyneth Paltrow is set to record a hip-hop track with husband Chris Martin for producer mogul Timbaland.

The Oscar-winning actress, who is six months pregnant, has agreed to work on the song after she's given birth.

And Timbaland thinks the pairing of Gwyneth and the Coldplay singer means they've a good chance of securing an international smash hit.

He says, "Coldplay are one of the very few bands I would consider working with .

"Chris Martin is a genius and we'll be working very closely together on his next project.

"I've been working on Gwyneth and she's finally agreed to help out with some vocals on a track with Chris.

"She said as soon as she's had her baby, she'll come in to the studio and have a go. The chemistry between those two is strong and if we can capture that on a song we'll have a real hit."

This whole thing makes me so fucking mad I can hardly breathe.

• Bush calls for same-sex marriage-ban amendment: 'Prevent the meaning of marriage from being changed forever'.


• Marriage vs. civil unions? There's no comparison.


• Mary Cheney Urged to Fight A Ban on Same-Sex Marriage. [Washington Post reg. req'd]


• I Do ... No, You Don't!: Why San Francisco's brash mayor is taking on Schwarzenegger and Bush over gay marriage.


• Jumping In to Wed the Masses. "...at least 3,000 couples jumped at the chance to marry during the frenzied first eight days that San Francisco allowed gay marriages. And I, a straight bachelor, have happily performed about 60 of the ceremonies...". [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Media Notes: Nuking Nader. "If Nader is going nowhere, who cares? Why all the angst?" [Washington Post reg. req'd]

Preppy Punks. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

For Elizabeth: Lifting the Veils of Autism, One by One by One. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

From Wordspy: Lad Lit. And a related story: Oh, to Write a 'Bridget Jones' for Men: A Guy Can Dream. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Nick and Jessica's Book Proposal, Excerpt I. Read three full pages of the proposal here.

I guess Kabbalah is so 5 minutes ago--Britney Turns Celibate:

Pop star Britney Spears has given up sex as she renews her relationship with Christianity.

According to British magazine Star, the singer has vowed to remain celibate after a string of disastrous relationships with Justin Timberlake, Colin Farrell, Fred Durst and her married choreographer Columbus Short.

Spears is seeing two counselors and paying regular visits to church after her wild behavior of the past year peaked last month with her shock wedding in Las Vegas to childhood pal Jason Alexander, which was annulled 55 hours later.

A friend of Britney's says, "The last month has brought on this huge realization for Britney. She's in a mess, but she's trying as hard as she can to sort it all out.

"She has now decided to stay celibate for a while and to start going to church regularly. She is also seeing two counselors. She knows she had to do this to get her life back in order.

"That wedding was not what a good Christian would have done and Britney knew it. Straight after the incident her mother Lynne bought her the book "Conversations With God," which made her realize just how inappropriate her behavior was."

How much do I want an iPod? THIS MUCH. I can hardly stand it. I see an order in my future--read: this week.

New Best Site Ever: WordSpy. [via Gothamist] "devoted to lexpionage, the sleuthing of new words and phrases. These aren't "stunt words" or "sniglets," but new terms that have appeared multiple times in newspapers, magazines, books, Web sites, and other recorded sources." An absolutely fascinating look at the evolution of the modern English language and how pop-culture has effected/invaded our lexicon. The creator of this site, Paul McFedries, also has a book by the same title. I am going to start using "mucus trooper" often.

New York Driver Nabbed While Watching Porn Movie, Chocolate Foam.

Nader to Liberals: Fuck You. [Wonkette]
Related news: Ignoring Democrats' Pleas, Nader Announces Run for White House. [NYTimes reg. req'd]
More information at: VoteNader.

Disenchanted Bush Voters Consider Crossing Over. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Wed the People? (In Order to Form a More Perfect Gay Union). [NYTimes reg. req'd]

P.S.: Jared Leto's band = 30 Seconds to Mars.

Mother Jones: Brothers in Arms?: George W. Bush and John Kerry both spent their mid twenties in uniform. The similarities end there. [via LowCulture]

Instead of Dr. Ruth, a Nurse Called Sue. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Women Tailor Sex Industry to Their Eyes. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Now Preening on the Coffee Table: The TiVo Remote Control. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Bush Provides 2.6 Million Examples of Misleading. "When McClellan was asked about the president's personal promise to create 2.6 million new jobs, McClellan said the president is not interested "in crunching numbers.""

NOW Action Alert: Demand the Firing of Colorado Football Coach

1. The full dismissal of the University of Colorado's football coach Gary Barnett and Athletic Director Richard Tharp. Placing Coach Barnett on paid leave does not address the severity of this issue and leaving Director Tharp in his position is unacceptable.

2. The appointment of sexual assault prevention experts to the University of Colorado panel investigating athletic recruiting scandals, and sexual harassment and rape allegations at the school.

3. The removal of the co-chair of the panel, Joyce Lawrence, who has been outspoken in her suggestions that the women victims weren't tough enough or brought it on themselves. Lawrence refuses to step down even though she has proved herself incapable of unbiased assessment.

4. The removal of Bishop Philip Porter from the panel because of his close association with former Coach Bill McCartney, and because of the revelation, after his appointment, of Porter's status as a co-founder of Promise Keepers, which promotes the submission of women to men.

Justice Dept. Seeks Hospitals' Records of Some Abortions. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Doctors, Hospitals Challenge U.S. Subpoenas: Justice Department Seeks Confidential Medical Records on Banned Late-Term Abortion Procedure. [WashingtonPost reg. req'd]

John Ashcroft, Stay Out of Our Medical Records. [ActForChange]

Sign up for the March for Women's Lives on Sunday, April 25, 2004 in Washington, D.C.

-------------------------------------------------------

The funniest thing I've heard so far today:

Fox5 News Morning News anchor Michael Gargiulo:
Polaroid is urging everyone not to "Shake it like a Polaroid picture"... It is, however, still all right to "kiss your neighbor" as long as you know who they are.

Related story: Polaroid Warns Film Users Not to 'Shake It'

The second funniest thing I've heard all day:

Conan O'Brien's monologue:
"We meant no harm with our comedy piece the other night," O'Brien continued, "translated" into French as: "The other night, I wet the bed like a little girl."

"I was a stranger in a strange land and I was very insensitive," he went on, with the subtitle: "I have a small penis."

Related stories: NBC's Conan O'Brien Issues 'Apology' to Quebec; Conan O'Brien's apology too late for Ontario's francophone affairs minister.

The La's Set to Reform? [via Stereogum]

Seven Silly Questions for Barbie. [TVGuide.com]

Today, there's just this image. For now, anyway... [thanks, Charles]

This is so fantastic I am reprinting the whole column from Sunday's NYTimes. Finally, someone is saying what needs to be said about this whole debacle.

February 15, 2004
FRANK RICH
My Hero, Janet Jackson

It may be a dirty job, but somebody's got to do it. Two weeks after the bustier bust, almost no one has come to the defense of Janet Jackson. I do so with a full heart. By baring a single breast in a slam-dunk publicity stunt of two seconds' duration, this singer also exposed just how many boobs we have in this country. We owe her thanks for a genuine public service.

You can argue that Ms. Jackson is the only honest figure in this Super Bowl of hypocrisy. She was out to accomplish a naked agenda — the resuscitation of her fading career on the eve of her new album's release — and so she did. She's not faking much remorse, either. Last Sunday she refused to appear on the Grammys rather than accede to CBS's demand that she perform a disingenuous, misty-eyed ritual "apology" to the nation for her crime of a week earlier. By contrast, Justin Timberlake, the wimp who gave the English language the lasting gift of "wardrobe malfunction," did as he was told, a would-be pop rebel in a jacket and a tie, looking like a schoolboy reporting to the principal's office. Ms. Jackson, one suspects, is laughing all the way to the bank.

There are plenty of Americans to laugh at, starting with the public itself. If we are to believe the general outcry, the nation's families were utterly blindsided by the Janet-Justin pas de deux while watching an entertainment akin to "Little Women." As Laura Bush put it, "Parents wouldn't know to turn their television off before that happened." They wouldn't? In the two-plus hours "before that happened," parents saw not only the commercials featuring a crotch-biting dog, a flatulent horse and a potty-mouthed child but also the number in which the crotch-grabbing Nelly successfully commanded a gaggle of cheerleaders to rip off their skirts. What signal were these poor, helpless adults waiting for before pulling their children away from the set? Apparently nothing short of a simulated rape would do.

Once the deed was done, the audience couldn't stop watching it. TV viewers with TiVo set an instant-replay record as they slowed down the offending imagery with a clinical alacrity heretofore reserved for the Zapruder film. Lycos, the Internet search engine, reported that the number of searches for Janet Jackson tied the record set by 9/11-related searches on and just after 9/11.

"That a single breast received as much attention as the first attack on United States soil in 60 years is beyond belief," wrote Aaron Schatz, the columnist on the Lycos Top 50 site. (Though not, perhaps, to the fundamentalist zealots who attacked us.)

For those who still couldn't get enough, the cable news channels giddily played the video over and over to remind us of just how deplorable it was. Even though by this point the networks were blurring the breast with electronic pasties, there was still an erotic kick to be milked: the act of a man tearing off a woman's clothes was as thrilling to the audience as whatever flesh was revealed therein, perhaps more so. But to say that aloud is to travel down a road that our moral watchdogs do not want to take. It's the unwritten rule of our culture that the public is always right. The "folks," as Bill O'Reilly is fond of condescending to them, are always the innocent victims of the big, bad cultural villains. They're never complicit in the crime. The idea that the folks might have the free will to tune out tasteless TV programming or do without TV altogether — or that they might eat up the sleaze, with or without young 'uns in the room — is almost never stated on television, for obvious reasons of fiscal self-interest. You don't insult your customers.

Since the public is blameless for its role in creating a market for displays like the Super Bowl's, who should be the scapegoat instead? If you peruse Mr. O'Reilly's admonitions in his first three programs dealing with the topic, or the tirades of The Wall Street Journal editorial page and right-wing direct-mail mills like the Parents Television Council and Concerned Women for America, you'll find a revealing pattern: MTV, CBS and their parent corporation, Viacom, are the exclusive targets of the invective. The National Football League is barely mentioned, if at all. To blame the country's highest-rated sports operation, after all, might risk insulting the football-watching folks to whom these moral watchdogs pander for fun and profit.

But the N.F.L. is in the sex business as assiduously as CBS and MTV, and for the same reason: it wants those prurient eyeballs. It's now been more than a quarter-century since Super Bowl X, when the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders first caught the attention of the nation. "The audience deserves a little sex with its violence," Chuck Milton, a CBS sports producer, said back then.

The N.F.L. has since worked tirelessly to fill that need. This year was not the first MTV halftime show that the league has ordered to try to expand its aging audience beyond the Levitra demographic. The first such collaboration, Super Bowl XXXV three years ago, featured Britney Spears all but falling out of a halter top and numbers in which both Mr. Timberlake (then appearing with 'NSync) and Nelly grabbed their crotches. There was, to my eye, twice as much crotch-grabbing then as there was this year, but that show generated no outrage whatsoever.

It did, however, attract two million more viewers than the game itself. The N.F.L. wanted more of the same for 2004, which is why the league's commissioner, Paul Tagliabue, released a statement saying, "We're pleased to work again with MTV" when announcing the encore. Or pleased up to a point. When MTV proposed that part of the show be devoted to a performance of the song "An American Prayer" by Bono to increase awareness of the horrific AIDS epidemic in Africa, the N.F.L. said no — even though Bono had done the league the favor of giving the 2002 Super Bowl halftime show a dignified musical tribute to the victims of the 9/11 attacks.

The mention of a sexually transmitted disease might dampen the libido of the salacious MTV show that the N.F.L. wanted this year and wanted so badly that the league remained silent even when MTV's pregame publicity promised that the performance would contain "some shocking moments." As one participant in the production told me, the N.F.L. saw "every camera angle" at the show's rehearsals and thus was no less aware of its general tone than CBS and MTV were. You don't hire Ms. Jackson, who's been steadily exposing more of her breasts for over a decade on magazine covers, to sing "Rock Your Body" if you have a G-rated game plan. Nonetheless, Joe Browne, the league's flak, pleaded total innocence after the event, releasing a hilarious statement that the N.F.L., like the public, was the unwitting victim of a show that it had both commissioned and helped supervise: "We applaud the F.C.C.'s investigation into the MTV-produced halftime. We and our fans were embarrassed by the entire show."

That investigation, piggybacked by last week's Congressional hearings, is an election-year stunt as full of hot air as the Bud Light horse flatulence ad. "Like millions of Americans, my family and I gathered around the television for a celebration," declared Michael Powell, the F.C.C. chairman, upon announcing that the entire halftime would be examined. A celebration of what, exactly? Didn't Mr. Powell, the nation's chief television regulator, watch the previous MTV halftime show?

He promises to conduct the investigation himself — a meaningless gesture, though it may gain him an audience and perhaps a photo op with Ms. Jackson. Mr. Powell's real agenda here is to conduct a show trial that might counter his well-earned reputation as a wholly owned subsidiary of our media giants. Viacom has been a particularly happy beneficiary of the deregulatory push of his reign, buying up every slice of the media pie that's not nailed down. Should CBS be found guilty of "indecency" by the feds, the total penalty would amount to some $5 million, roughly the price of two 30-second Super Bowl commercials. Congress's new push to increase those fines tenfold is just as laughable. Viacom took in $26.6 billion last year.

Not for nothing did the company's stock actually go up the day after the Super Bowl. The halftime show was great merchandising for both MTV and CBS, the go-to network for "Victoria's Secret Fashion Show." Not to be left without a piece of the action, even NBC got into the act. Citing the Jackson flap, it decreed that two split-second shots of an 80-year-old woman's breast in an emergency room sequence in "E.R." be excised. But the "E.R." star Noah Wyle then went on NBC's "Today" show the morning of the broadcast to joke about the decision, and the network-owned NBC affiliate in New York used the banned breast as a promo for its post-"E.R." news broadcast: "What you won't see on tonight's episode of `E.R.' — at 11!" Thus did NBC successfully transform its decision not to bare geriatric flesh into a sexual tease to hype ratings. This is true marketing genius, American-style.

What's next? Some are predicting that all the tape delays being injected into TV events to pre-empt future wardrobe malfunctions will be the death of spontaneous, live TV. But the moment an awards show takes a ratings hit, this new electronic prophylactic will be quietly abandoned by the networks even faster than the N.F.L.'s vague threat not to collaborate with MTV next year.

Ms. Jackson, the biggest winner in this whole escapade, is already back on the air. Her official rehabilitation began right after the Super Bowl, when BET started broadcasting a 10-part series of "special Black History Month" spots in which she profiles historical luminaries like Harriet Tubman, Paul Robeson and Sidney Poitier.

"Her tone is serious and focused, with the air and diction of a seasoned lecturer," says the network's news release, which also notes that "the spots feature Ms. Jackson clad in classic black." Wasn't her Super Bowl dominatrix costume classic black as well? Well, never underestimate the power of synergy. BET is another wholly owned subsidiary of Viacom.

I would highly recommend going to see A Hard Day's Night (locally at the AFI Silver Theater) in honor of the 40th anniversary of its release. See the trailer here, and then buy it on DVD. If your curious, Robert Ebert recently reviewed the movie.

For your celebrity gossip needs: Friday's Daily Dish: (J.Lo's diamond Valentine from P.Diddy); Thursday's Daily Dish (Xtina writes to Britney); Wednesday's Daily Dish (J.Lo's butt so last year; Paris' party antics; Simpsons movie).

Sorry for the late notice: E!'s Ask The Answer Bitch.

From E! News: ""Can you tell me how to get, how to get to...1600 Pennsylvania Avenue?" Big Bird, Elmo and the rest of the Sesame Street gang are heading to NBC's West Wing. In an episode that airs March 3, the Muppets make their first prime-time guest appearance by helping the First Lady (Stockard Channing) film a public-service announcement about going to the doctor."

The Evil Geniuses of Kiddie Schlock. "A marathon of the Krofft series [H. R. Pufnstuf] runs this Tuesday, from 8 to 11:30 p.m. on TV Land...". [NYTimes reg. req'd]

O.C. Exec Defends Oliver. [TVGuide reg. req'd sometimes]

As Barbie Kicks Ken to the Curb, Who Gets Custody of the Fans? [Washington Post reg. req's]

Introducing a Cartoonist Named Crumb. Sophie Crumb, daughter of Robert Crumb, is beginning to make a name for herself." [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Fashion alert: Pierrot designer "Pierre Carrilero, a self-proclaimed "flaming creature," brought a bit of wink and whimsy to the usually bulky and boring winter woolens....Pink, Henri Mancini, librarian chic, and après ski were all terms that came to mind with the collection. Immensely cute and very wearable—every item in the collection made perfect sense for the cold winter months. "Winter is not really an erotic season, so I was looking to find eroticism in it.""

In related news, note this Sunday's NYTimes headline, Sex Doesn't Sell: Miss Prim Is In. [reg. req'd]

CBS Apologizes for Grammy Show. More detail at Native Americans Rap OutKast. Hey, I loved the OutKast (Andre 3000) performance, but I do think it crossed the line. Why the uproar?:

Brother Elk cited the use of feathers, sacred symbols of Native Americans, as a particular abuse. He said he understood if a majority of Grammy viewers missed the distinction.

"If people were wearing yarmulkes and the Hasidic dress and bumping and grinding, we would see that as ridiculous, but for some reason we don't see what OutKast did as ridiculous," Brother Elk said.

Why Jews Are Concerned Over Mel Gibson's Rendering Of The Passion.

Speaking of television controversies...Canada Condemns 'Racist' Conan O'Brien TV Show. "Canada's government on Friday condemned a show by U.S. late-night television host Conan O'Brien that insulted people in French-speaking Quebec and seemed to suggest everyone in the province was homosexual." More details in the article: An Insolent Puppet Roils Canadian Politics. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Controversial Exhibition Focuses on Pain.

Rockers at an Exhibition. Followed by, A Rough Experience in Seattle. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

The World at Ears' Length. About the iPod in New York. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

From Fuck Hallmark. [via Gawker]

Stupid Cupid. "While many lovers are doling out flowers and jewelry Saturday night, James Wynen plans to be dispensing voodoo dolls and stickpins. The idea is to take aim at both ex-lovers and traditional Valentine's Day sentiments." [WashingtonPost reg. req'd]

Anti-Valentine's day cards. [via Gothamist]

Valentine's Day not a universal love celebration.

Hardline Hindus protest on eve of Valentine's Day. "Radical Hindu groups across India have set fire to Valentine's cards and threatened to blacken the faces of couples celebrating February 14...".

Saudi Arabia Says Valentine's Day Incurs God's Ire. "Saudi Arabia's religious authorities have ordered Muslims to shun the "pagan" holiday of Valentine's Day so as not to incur God's wrath...".

Activists Target Chocolate, Gold on Valentine's Day. "Global justice advocates are urging U.S.-based companies that profit from chocolate and gold sales on Valentine's Day to do more to help the people and the environment where the key ingredients for their goods are originally produced."

Valentine's Day in Japan is All About The Chocolate. "The people of Japan celebrate Valentine's Day in their own unique fashion. The Japanese - who have a complex set of gift giving traditions, observe the day to celebrate love with a mix of romance, friendship and obligation."

Valentine's Day Stats.

Barbie's all Kate Spade now, so she doesn't need this schlub anymore: Barbie and Ken 'Split' After 43 Years.

Official Press Release: The Storybook Romance Comes to an End for Barbie(R) and Ken(R).

Statements from Keeping Ken.com:

STATEMENT ON BARBIE AND KEN'S RUMORED BREAK-UP FROM HER NEWLY-HIRED NYC CELEBRITY PUBLICIST, KEN SUNSHINE (also a representative for Ben Affleck):


"I never comment on my client's personal lives, but I will tell you that Barbie and Ken will always remain the best of friends. She looks forward to spending more time at her Malibu beach house with close friends and family, and concentrating on her budding film career. So at this time, we ask that you respect her privacy."

KEN'S STATEMENT THROUGH HIS MANAGER AT MATTEL, RUSSELL ARONS:

"Barbie and I have decided to spend some time apart. People often joke about my role as 'Mr. Barbie,' but I wish her all the best in her new endeavors. She's got a great new look and so many opportunities on the horizon and I am confident that we'll continue to keep a long-lasting friendship."

Related Sites:

• Social Commentary Barbie: "A Utah artist's right to make naked Barbie photographs was upheld [recently]...".


• An art site: The Distorted Barbie.


• Visible Barbie Project. What Barbie looks like from the inside.


• Salon's What's it all about, Barbie? [from 1997]


• Here's person who handmakes custom character Barbie dolls.

Has everyone seen the wildly hilarious Quiznos ads featuring the Spongmonkey? Read about them in the article, "A Talking Oven Mitt and Misbehaving Sandwich Eaters," from the NYTimes. See more singing animals at creator Joel Veitch's website: rathergood.com. The Viking kitties singing Electric 6's "Gay Bar" is incredible. (This guy also does the singing kitties commercials on VH1--I highly recommend the Chaka Kahn commercial.)

Speaking of amusing animation: The Little Red Monkey by Jason Crystal.

New Yorkers note: "Jenny I've got your number". "Someone is auctioning off the phone number, 212-867-5309...".

Hey Everyone! It's DC's Coyote Ugly's Grand Opening Weekend!!!

Poll: Office Computers Used for Porn, Romance. I mean, that's all I use my work computer for...

Mel Gibson, the Real David Puddy.

State of the Art: For iPod, 6 Flavors of Flattery. [NYTiimes reg. req'd]

I couldn't be happier that this issue won't go away.

• Bush Aides Accused of Destroying Military Records.


• An Open Letter from Michael Moore to George "I'm a War President!" Bush.


• Bush's Dental Records from the time period in question.

Image from the Brownie Wise Papers, ca. 1928-1968, Archives Center, National Museum of American History.

Texas Saleswoman Faces Trial for Selling Sex Toys. " Webb is a representative for Passion Parties, a California company marketing potions, lotions and sexual toys sold at gatherings that mimic Tupperware parties."

Speaking of Tupperware and home parties...I hope you all tuned in to watch PBS's American Experience, Tupperware! which used a lot of material from my previous workplace. Make sure you check out the Jubilee Video Vault.

Michael McKean to Star in 'Hairspray'.

Darkness Singer Recalls His Own Janet Jackson Moment.

Tests Confirm Bird Flu on 2nd Del. Farm.

The Profitable Connections Of Halliburton: The New Yorker Examines How Cheney's Old Firm Cashed In on War. Read the whole New Yorker article here: CONTRACT SPORT by JANE MAYER: What did the Vice-President do for Halliburton?

An Absence in Alabama: As Bush's military service re-emerges as an issue, here is what we know—and don't know. Followed by White House Releases Bush Military Record.

Mandy Moore's FameTracker Fame Audit. Plus, check in on the Hey! It's That Guy! feature. I've added a new button to the FameTracker site on yor left, too.

Monday's Daily Dish.

Tongue-in-Chic: Paris Hilton's Confessions of an Heiress. [from the SmokingGun.com]

MTV Consigns Racy Videos to Late-Night Rotation.

Pentagon Clip Service's Clips Clipped. "Senior Pentagon managers have repeatedly ordered the department's widely read clipping service to exclude articles critical of the military and Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, according to officials familiar with the practice."

You know it's bad when: Pundit O'Reilly Now Skeptical About Bush.

Vote By Issue:

"Forget about red-faced rants and ketchup heiress spouses for a minute. PBS Online News Hour and Boston NPR affiliate WBUR invite prospective Democratic voters to blind taste test the candidates on the basis of their platforms rather than their personalities. The premise is simple: read unattributed statements from the seven remaining candidates on 14 topics (tax cuts, gun laws, national security, same-sex marriage, education, etc.). Click on the statements that you agree with most. At the end of the quiz, you're presented with a political report card revealing who said what. Tally up who got most of your votes, then decide if your candidate is actually electable. Voila."

From MoveOn.org: 300,000 call for Censure by tomorrow?

Dear friend,

During the buildup to war, President Bush said the United States "must not ignore the threat gathering against us. Facing clear evidence of peril, we cannot wait for the final proof -- the smoking gun -- that could come in the form of a mushroom cloud.... We have every reason to assume the worst, and we have an urgent duty to prevent the worst from occurring." 1

On the eve of sending troops into battle, Bush asserted that "intelligence gathered by this and other governments leaves no doubt that the Iraq regime continues to possess and conceal some of the most lethal weapons ever devised." 2

Now David Kay, the CIA’s chief weapons inspector, has testified before Congress that these weapons do not exist.

In an attempt to evade responsibility for the misleading statements that pushed the nation into war, Bush has announced plans to form an independent inquiry to look into what went wrong. An inquiry would serve the Bush administration well: it would envelop the issue in a fog of uncertainty, deflect blame onto the intelligence services, and delay any political damage until 2005, after the upcoming election. 3

But the facts need no clarification. Despite repeated warnings from the CIA and the Defense Intelligence Agency, President Bush and his administration hyped and distorted the threat that Iraq posed. 4 And now that reality is setting in, the President wants to pin the blame on someone else. We can't let him.

Congress has the power to censure the President -- to formally reprimand him for betraying the nation's trust. If ever there was a time for this, it's now. Join our call on Congress to censure President Bush at: http://www.moveon.org/censure/

It's clear that we’ve been misled:

• David Kay said last week, "I'm personally convinced that there were not large stockpiles of newly produced weapons of mass destruction," and "We don't find the people, the documents or the physical plants that you would expect to find if the production was going on." 5 Kay said these things shortly after resigning from his post as Bush's chief weapons inspector in Iraq.
  
• Bush, in his 2003 State of the Union address, said, "the British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa." 6 Yet Ambassador Joe Wilson, who was sent to Niger in February 2002 to determine whether Iraq was trying to purchase uranium materials there, concluded that "intelligence related to Iraq's nuclear weapons program was twisted to exaggerate the Iraqi threat." 7
  
• A CIA report in February 2003 said: "We do not have any direct evidence that Iraq has used the period since [1998] to reconstitute its Weapons of Mass Destruction programs." 8

It's also clear that the misleading was deliberate:

• The respected Carnegie Endowment for International Peace recently found that the administration "systematically misrepresented the threat" from Iraq. 9
  
• The basis for President Bush's African uranium claim was known at the time to be forged and not credible.10 "Top White House officials knew that the CIA seriously disputed the claim that Saddam Hussein was seeking uranium in Africa long before the claim was included in Bush's January address to the nation," according to the Washington Post.11
  
• Secretary of State Colin Powell became alarmed at the level of intelligence distortion. When he read the first draft of his speech to the UN -- prepared for Powell by Vice President Dick Cheney's chief of staff -- he was so upset that he lost his temper, throwing several pages in the air and declaring, "I'm not reading this. This is bullsh--."12

Our democracy only works when we know the truth. We now know President Bush and his administration deliberately misled Congress and the American people. Censure is the least we should expect in response.

The independent inquiry will need a year or more to come to a conclusion, according to the Bush administration. It took less time than that for the country to go to war. We don't need more investigation, we need accountability, and we need it now.

Join our call on Congress to censure President Bush at: http://www.moveon.org/censure/

We'll be holding a press conference in Washington on Thursday, announcing our campaign for Censure. If you sign on now, we can count your signature at the press conference. Please sign on right away.

Thank you.

Sincerely,
- Adam, Carrie, Eli, James, Joan, Laura, Noah, Peter, Wes, and Zack
The MoveOn.org Team
Monday, February 9, 2004

Footnotes:
1. Washington Post, January 28, 2004
2. Official White House transcript, March 17, 2003
3. Washington Post, February 2, 2004
4. An excellent, comprehensive rundown on the Bush administration's deliberate distortion of intelligence is available from the Center for American Progress
5. New York Times, January 26, 2004
6. Official White House transcript, January 28, 2003
7. Joseph Wilson Op-Ed, New York Times, July 6, 2003
    Note: Wilson's wife, Valerie Plame, had her CIA cover blown, possibly by the White House, in apparent retaliation for Wilson's contradicting the White House's line on WMDs.
8. MSNBC News, Oct. 24, 2003
9. Carnegie Endowment for International Peace report, "WMD in Iraq: Evidence and Implications", January, 2004
10. New York Times, July 8, 2003
11. Washington Post News Service, July 23, 2003
12. US News & World Report, June 9, 2003
     Note: This article with the Powell quote is available for purchase from the US News & World Report archives for $2.95.

OutKast's 'Speakerboxxx/The Love Below' Is Album of Year. Yay!

And two completely strange picture from the Grammy's: Bootsy and Buckethead and Courtney Love (they actually let her present?).

Official Coachella lineup released. Who's in? I think this is totally worth the $140 2-day pass. Seriously, just say the word and I am in.

FINALLY!! Thank You NYTimes. When a Search Engine Isn't Enough, Call a Librarian. [reg. req'd]

They're Celebrities, and You're Not. "For years, more and more people have been getting news from entertainment sources like "Saturday Night Live," Jay Leno or David Letterman. If viewers respond to this easy-listening political chatter, why not build a show around it?" [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Paying for the sound of silence: Apple's iTunes selling tracks with nothing on them.

The Pornography Industry vs. Digital Pirates. "The copyright rumble is playing out a little differently in the red-light districts of cyberspace." [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Let's get real about boob tube. "Once we, as a country, are used to boobs, we can focus on other things. Like football. And the economy. When boobs are boring, we'll see a new clarity."

Shock and Ow: Janet Jackson's Flash of Jewelry. "Nearly a week later, the finger-pointing hasn't stopped, and there is so much aggressive censorship and anti-breast lobbying underway one worries that new mothers will soon be asked to breast-feed through a woolen pullover."

EXCUSE ME??? U.S. coach says football "sex" parties needed. "The head football coach at the University of Colorado has told a former colleague it would be harder to recruit star athletes if the school did not show them a good time and take them to sex parties."

Something in the Air: "A Midwestern power plant found a novel way to make sure local residents weren't harmed by pollutants: It bought the town and emptied it." [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Gifts at Sundance.

Friday's Daily Dish: Xtina admits dressing like a hooker; Paris not getting married.

Fashion update: Revisiting the 50's, Without Feminist Tears. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

This is about two years late, but what the hell...Young urban Americans get enthused over knitting.

How to Make: Iron-On Pillowcase Slogans.

40 Years Ago...
Ed Sullivan stands with The Beatles during a rehearsal for the British group's first American appearance, on the 'Ed Sullivan Show,' in New York on Feb. 9, 1964.

Beyonce's Hospitality Rider from her appearance at the SuperBowl.

Britney news of note:
Britney Denies Renting Porn Tapes!
Britney Breaks Her Silence. BritBrit sits down to chat with ET's moppet, Steven Cojocaru.

It's time for a new Ask the Answer Bitch!

Tuesday's Daily Dish. Wednesday's Daily Dish (Britney still dating ex? Kylie on Queer Eye). Thursday's Daily Dish (Robert Downey, Jr gets a tattoo of himself; Quentin & Uma?).

Huge Coachella Update!

The Onion A.V.. Club interview with illustrator Alex Ross. You should also check out Mythology: The DC Comics Art of Alex Ross.

Academy Eyeing Film Museum.

So Many Films, but Only a Few Are Treasures. [NYTimes reg. req'd]

Darth Vader, Brent Ousting Shakespeare Gems. "Shakespeare's most famous quotations are less memorable than the painful sayings of TV boss David Brent in "The Office," a British survey found on Wednesday."

Georgia school board: Student can't work at Hooters for class credit .

From DeclareYourself: "Friendster will invite all of the presidential candidates to post an official personal profile on www.friendster.com" as part of an "Unprecedented Internet, Radio and Media Strategy Planned to Reach First-Time Voters."

Tenet Exposes Bush's Misleading on WMD. [MoveOn.org]

Tom Osborne: Protecting Your Children from Titties Since 2004. [wonkette]

Is former Nebraska head football coach Rep. Tom Osborne a hypocrite for founding the Sex and Violence in the Media Caucus? Of course not.

Let's say you're the head coach of a college football powerhouse, the kind that corn-fed, apple-cheeked farm kids look to for role models. One of your players throws a woman down the stairs! Another invites a woman into his room! (Sweet.) But then "pin[s] her down and ejaculate[s] on her face in front of his friends"! (Ooooh. . .) So, as that football coach (remember?), you'd just suspend the players for a game or two. Fair enough. Or, as Tom Osborne said when he was in just that position with a player he coached: "It's not as though Lawrence is an angry young man all the time and a threat to society." That's right. Just sometimes. And just the female half.

What's more, no breasts were revealed. And as far as we know, none of these episodes took place during a nationally televised half-time show.

Thanks to reader D.P. for helping us to clear up this issue.

I've got a request in to Hostess to find out where Ding Dong's are sold in the DC area. If anyone knows, please please PLEASE tell me.

Dear friend,

In an attempt to escape responsibility for the misleading statements that led the nation to war, President Bush has announced plans to form an independent inquiry to look into what went wrong. An inquiry would serve the Bush administration well: it would envelop the issue in a fog of uncertainty, deflect blame onto the intelligence services, and push any political damage into 2005, after the upcoming election.

But the facts need no clarification. Despite repeated warnings from the CIA and Defense Intelligence Agency, President Bush and his administration hyped and distorted the threat that Iraq posed. And now that reality is setting in, the President seeks to pin the blame on someone else. We can't let him.

Congress has the power to censure the President -- to formally reprimand him for his betrayal of the nation's trust. If ever there was a time to use this function, it is now. Join the call for Congress to censure President Bush now at:
http://www.moveon.org/censure/?id=-2581577-7OYSJuy8R6xTwcVyiCeXrw

Thanks.

Results of Harvard's Dialect Survey. You can easily waste a lot of work time looking through this with your co-workers and friends.

Friday's Daily Dish.

Monday's Daily Dish.

Pixies Tour Officially a Go.

Homer Simpson Art Car. It is made of various electronic-al keys. [via Burned By The Sun]

German Anatomist's Corpse Exhibit Blasted. I read about this in Mary Roach's fabulous book, Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers, which all of you should read. If Gunther von Hagens's "Body Worlds" exhibit comes to America, I will be there.

Why won't this go away? Does one breast really warrant this much attention? WHY is it a big deal?WHY WHY WHY??

NFL Exposed For What It Is. "We have two new federal investigations in this country: One into weapons of mass destruction, and, now, thanks to the Super Bowl halftime show, one into weapons of mass distraction." and "For years NFL marketers have preyed on the sensibilities of the nation to sell their sponsors' products. They have appropriated sex, patriotism, war and even the tragedy of Sept. 11 as commercial vehicles, and used them all to peddle more Coors and cars."

A Major "Malfunction"

Feds to Investigate Janet Jackson's Flash (with a 43 picture slideshow -- Vivid Blurry has a lot of pictures, also.)

"Perhaps the one moment of honesty in that coldly choreographed tableau was when the cup came off and out tumbled what looked like a normal middle-aged woman's breast instead of an idealized Playboy bunny implant." - NYTimes Alessandra Stanley [reg req'd]

"Whenever your brother is on trial for molesting children, it's a great idea to keep the family in the news by secretly planning to have Justin Timberlake rip off your clothes for the Superbowl's 80+ million viewers." - Gawker

"That show kicked off MTV's "Choose or Lose" campaign, a campaign all about being a good American. Boobies are American as apple pie..." - Wonkette

Enough of that already....Six more weeks of winter is bullshit--yet, not surprising: Groundhog Booed As He Sees His Shadow. And the answer to the question: How many Punxsutawney Phils have there been since the first Groundhog Day?

"Hey Ya!" Charlie Brown.